First, the question that should be on the minds of all Twins fans is whether or not Mauer can be persuaded to take a hometown discount.  This is a particularly acute issue for Mauer who has not only spent his entire career in the Twins organization, but grew up in Minnesota as well. For both sides this is more than just a financial equation.  The Twins may need Mauer to take a hometown discount, but they also need to make a serious offer.  It is not realistic or fair to expect Mauer to agree to $18 million a year for five years, or something like that, but $23 million a year for six to eight years, while still a discount is not insulting or unreasonable.

For Mauer, it is not just a question of staying in his hometown, because for $200 million or so he could learn to love any number of cities.  It is also a question of the narrative Mauer wants to set for his career.  Mauer is not your garden variety reigning MVP.  He is a great player who has the potential to be a great player of historic dimensions, an inner circle Hall of Famer.  Spending one’s entire career with one franchise lends an additional sheen to this type of player.  If Mauer stays with the Twins he could be the greatest player in Twins history by the time he is forty.  For a Minnesota native, that might be worth making a little bit less money over the course of a career which will be extremely lucrative no matter where he plays.  If he ends up with the Yankee, Dodgers, Red Sox, Cubs or most other franchise he will never achieve that status.  It is certainly understandable if Mauer decides that he wants a change, is tired of Minnesota, wants to make 10-15% more money and would like a better chance of playing on a World Series winner too, but the advantages of staying with the Twins should not be overlooked either.

The situation in which the Twins find themselves regarding Mauer is not new for Minnesota, but is still unfortunate.  The inequality in baseball payroll is often misunderstood, used to gratuitously criticize the Yankees, and occasionally used by teams to excuse poor business, not just baseball, decision.  Nonetheless, this seems like a special case.  This is not just a case of a mid-sized market team being outbid for Jason Bay or some other star free agent.  It is a case of a team being unable and perhaps unwilling to retain a player who is one of the very best in the game and has the potential to be a player of extraordinary significance to the team and whole state.

The serious argument for the Twins to trade Mauer is not that they cannot afford him, but that it may not be the best use of their resources. Committing roughly 25%, possibly more, to one player, even one as talented as Mauer severely limits options when assembling a team.  Additionally if, for some unforeseen reason, Mauer’s skills erode more quickly than expected, the Twins will be stuck for many years paying for his contract.  This is the exact type of mistake that mid-market teams cannot afford to make.  While these arguments are legitimate, Mauer is not a high risk player with a history of injuries, fighting with managers or anything like that.  In fact the opposite is true.  To the extent there is something like a valuable off the field presence, Mauer is one.

Baseball, the Twins and Mauer find themselves at a unique disequilibrium.  They all benefit from Mauer staying the Twins, but there is a strong possibility that Mauer will be wearing another uniform next year.  Mauer benefits because he gets to keep playing in his hometown, while the Twins because they get the guaranteed services of one of the very best players in the game.  Moreover, it is good for baseball if Mauer stays with the Twins.  It demonstrates that mid-market teams can be competitive and retain their top players.  It also helps baseball oppose the criticism that the game is simply about money.  Lastly, it makes the games more fun for all fans if teams like the Twins can have and keep superstars too.

Mauer’s situation is unusual because of the hometown connection, but the question of what can be done about this is worth exploring.  New owners could be asked to demonstrate a commitment and willingness to retain home grown stars who attain a certain, extremely high level of accomplishment.  A fund, in turn, could be set up so that teams in middle sized and smaller markets could have 10% subsidy when trying to sign potentially departing stars. A system for identifying one franchise player per team and providing assistance to middle and small market teams seeking to retain their franchise player would be another way to do this.  None of these ideas are easy or perfect, but it would make sense to begin thinking about them more seriously.

]]> http://thefastertimes.com/sport/2010/03/19/should-the-twins-trade-joe-mauer/feed/ http://thefastertimes.com/sport/2010/03/19/fantasy-baseball-starting-pitchers-part-1-tim-lincecum-goes-for-three-straight-cy-youngs/ http://thefastertimes.com/sport/2010/03/19/fantasy-baseball-starting-pitchers-part-1-tim-lincecum-goes-for-three-straight-cy-youngs/#comments Fri, 19 Mar 2010 14:57:06 +0000 Jon Lewin http://thefastertimes.com/sport/2010/03/19/fantasy-baseball-starting-pitchers-part-1-tim-lincecum-goes-for-three-straight-cy-youngs/ Fantasy Baseball: Pitchers are generally riskier than hitters, but in 2009, players such as Jose Reyes, David Wright and Josh Hamilton showed that hitters could be risky as well. Meanwhile, top-rated pitchers such Tim Lincecum and CC Sabathia lived up to expectations. Johan Santana did not live up to his draft position, but still ended up with good stats.

So if you plan to have at least two of the following 24 pitchers on your team, it may be worth your while to look for an ace at the top as well as a pitcher lower in the rankings with lots of upside.

First Base Rankings
Second Base Rankings
Shortstop Rankings
Third Base Rankings
Outfield Rankings Part 1
Outfield Rankings Part 2
Catcher Rankings

TIER 1

Tim Lincecum followed up his 2008 Cy Young season – 2.62 ERA, 1.17 WHIP, 265 K in 227 IP with an even better one – 2.48 ERA, 1.05 WHIP and 261 K in 225 IP. His wins dropped from 18 to 15, but that did not stop the Cy Young voters and will not stop Lincecum, still only 25, from being the first pitcher off the board.

In 287 lifetime starts, Roy Halladay has an ERA of 3.43 and a WHIP of 1.20, and that is with pitching his entire career in the AL East. Halladay, 33 in May seems to be getting better with age, with a 2.78 ERA and 1.05 WHIP in 2008 followed by 2.79 and 1.13 last year. After some low-strikeout years, Halladay went over 200 Ks each of the last two seasons. Halladay also had nine complete games in both 2008 and 2009, helping him to rack up 37 wins during that time. Halladay’s move to the NL may be somewhat offset by pitching home games in Philly’s ballpark, but with all those complete games, at least Brad Lidge will have fewer chances to cost him wins.

Felix Hernandez’s ERA in his four full seasons: 4.52, 3.92, 3.45, 2.49. Hernandez’s WHIP plummeted much more rapidly – 1.34, 1.38, 1.39, 1.14. Hernandez struck out more than 200 for the first time, but his IP also rose from 200.2 in 2008 to 238.2 in 2009, landing him on the Verducci Effect list. Hernandez led the majors with 29 quality starts. With Seattle rapidly improving, he has a chance at approaching 2009’s 19 wins. Hernandez turns 24 in April, so he is just starting to reach his star potential. Seattle just signed him to a five-year, $78M contract.

After being drafted sixth overall in 2002, Zack Greinke battled depression and social anxiety disorder before following up a positive 2008 with the best pitching performance of 2009 – 2.16 ERA, 1.07 WHIP and 242 K. Pitching for the punchless Royals held Greinke to 16 wins. Greinke was sensational throughout the season – with an 0.50 ERA in April and an 0.55 ERA in September. Greinke’s 229.1 IP in 2009 was not drastically higher than 2008’s 202.1. At 26, Greinke is set to cement his place as one of baseball’s top pitchers.

TIER 2

CC Sabathia got better as the year went on. He had a 2.74 ERA after the break with 102 K in 101.1 IP. Sabathia’s postseason ERA was 1.98 with 32 K in 36.1 IP. That postseason workload followed 230 IP, the third straight season Sabathia has reached that number. So far, the workload has not seemed to bother Sabathia, who turns 30 in July. Sabathia won 19 games for the second time in three years, and, unlike Greinke and Lincecum, has no worries about getting run support.

Dan Haren had a very good year – 3.13 ERA and 1.00 WHIP, but it was comprised of two very different halves. Before the break, Haren had an ERA of 2.01 and a WHIP of just 0.81. But Haren’s usual second-half slump resulted in a 4.62 ERA, though his WHIP was still respectable at 1.26 and he continued to strike out almost a batter per inning, finishing with 223 K in 229.1 IP. Haren has five straight seasons of at least 14 wins and a WHIP of 1.22 or lower. Over the last three years, Haren’s highest ERA was 3.33 and his lowest K total was 192. So despite his drastically different halves, Haren has actually been quite consistent.

In four full seasons, Justin Verlander has won at least 17 games three times with ERA between last year’s 3.45 and 2007’s 3.66. In 2009, Verlander had a career-best 1.18 WHIP, but the number that really stood out was his major-league best 269 K, which shattered his previous high of 183. Verlander had 240 IP after throwing 201.1 and 201 IP the last two seasons. The Tigers are apparently unworried that Verlander’s workload could result in another off-year like his 2008 – they just signed Verlander to a 5-year, $80M contract.

In his first seven starts, Johan Santana has an ERA of 0.78. He struck out ten or more batters three times. Then Santana’s year fell apart along with the Mets’ season, and he ended up undergoing surgery to remove bone chips from his elbow. While the Mets’ 2009 injury woes are continuing with fellow stars Jose Reyes and Carlos Beltran, Santana appears to be fully recovered from his surgery and ready to resume his dominance. Santana had similar surgery before the 2004 season, when he won his first Cy Young.

Adam Wainwright’s ERA the last three seasons: 3.70, 3.20, 2.63. Wainwright’s 1.21 WHIP was actually higher than 2008’s 1.18, but his 212 K were more than 50% higher than his previous best of 136. Add in 19 wins, and Wainwright came close to winning the NL Cy Young. At 28, Wainwright has a good chance of contending for the award again.

TIER 3

Jon Lester’s 15 W, 3.41 ERA and 1.23 WHIP were similar to his 2008 numbers: 16, 3.21, 1.27. but his Ks jumped from 152 to 225 in seven fewer innings. For the second straight season, Lester’s ERA and WHIP went down in the second half. Despite a big rise in IP from 2008 to 2009, Lester managed to defy the Verducci Effect. The rise in Ks gives the 26-year-old Lester a shot to become a fantasy ace this season.

Cole Hamels became an ace in 2008 at 24, going 14-10 with a 3.09 ERA, 1.08 WHIP, 196 K and winning both the NLCS and World Series MVPs. But in 2009, Hamels tailed off to 10-11, 4.32 ERA, 1.29 WHIP. Perhaps it was all the innings he threw in 2008 – 227.1 in the regular season and another 35 in the postseason. The Verducci Effect predicted trouble for Hamels, who had some elbow discomfort in spring training 2009 and missed Opening Day. Or maybe it was that his BABIP jumped 58 points. Hamels’ HR and BB allowed were basically the same as before. While Hamels again got to the World Series, his overall 2009 IP – 193.2 plus 19.1 in the postseason, was much lower in 2009. Still only 26, Hamels could regain his ace status this season as Justin Verlander did last year.

Josh Beckett has been a good, not great fantasy pitcher since coming to Boston. In four seasons, 2009’s 3.86 ERA was his second-lowest and his 1.19 WHIP tied for second-lowest. Beckett’s 199 K was his highest Boston total. He has at least 16 wins three out of the four years, including 17 last season. Beckett might well have been a fantasy ace last season if he were not in the AL East. He had a 5.34 ERA in five games against the Yankees, 5.02 ERA in five games against the Rays and 10.45 ERA in two games against Toronto. Beckett turns 30 in May and is in a contract year.

Matt Cain had a breakout year with career bests in wins (14), ERA (2.89) and WHIP (1.18). His Ks dipped slightly but so did his walks. Cain’s HR total has risen the last three years from 14 to 19 to 22. At 25, Cain can continue to improve, but he does not figure to get a lot of wins with the Giants’ run support.

Javier Vazquez went from a 4.67 ERA and 1.32 WHIP with the White Sox in the AL in 2008 to a career-best 2.87 ERA and 1.03 WHIP with the Braves in the NL. Now he returns to the AL and returning to the Yankees, with whom he had his worst ERA in the last decade – 4.91 in 2004. Vazquez actually got off to a good start in 2004 and made the All-Star team with 10 wins, 3.56 ERA and 1.15 WHIP at the break. But his second-half numbers were grisly – 6.92 ERA and 1.49 WHIP. Still, Vazquez has plenty to offer, even if he is unlikely to duplicate his 2009. Vazquez never gets hurt – at least 198 IP each of the last ten years. Vazquez has a career WHIP of 1.25. and a career K/9 of 8.1. Pitching for the Yankees, Vazquez stands to get a lot of wins.

Cliff Lee followed his 2008 Cy Young season (2.54 ERA, 1.11 WHIP, 22 wins) with a good, not great, season split between Cleveland and Philadelphia, finishing with a 3.22 ERA and 1.24 WHIP. Lee threw a career-high 231.2 IP, followed by 40.1 IP in his sensational postseason (4-0, 1.56 ERA, 0.82 WHIP). Lee had surgery to remove a bone spur from his foot but is said to be fully recovered. On March 17, Lee was suspended for the first five games of the regular season after throwing over a hitter’s head in an exhibition game. He is expected to appeal. Lee loses Philly’s run support, but he is moving to a pitcher’s park and will be in a contract year.

After winning 12 games with a 3.10 ERA as a rookie in 2006, Josh Johnson underwent Tommy John surgery and did not pitch a full season again until 2009, when he won 15 games with a 3.23 ERA, 1.16 WHIP and 191 K in 209 IP. Johnson’s IP were 52 above his career high, earning him a spot on the Verducci Effect list. But the low-payroll Marlins believe in Johnson enough to sign him to a four-year, $39M deal.

TIER 4

Yovani Gallardo had 204 K in 185 IP, but also 94 walks. In fact, except for the Ks, allardo’s numbers – 3.73 ERA, 1.31 WHIP, 13 wins – were not special. But Gallardo, who just turned 24, is projected to become an ace at some point.

Tommy Hanson came up in June and quickly became one of the best pitchers in the NL. In 21 starts, Hanson went 11-4 with a 2.89 ERA, 1.18 WHIP and 116 K in 127.2 IP. Unlike fellow rookie star J.A. Happ, Hanson, 23, is projected to become an ace, perhaps as soon as this year.

Clayton Kershaw had one of the top ERAs in the NL at 2.79. His first half was good, but his second half was great - 2.27 ERA, 1.16 WHIP, 86 K in only 77.1 IP. Talk about a lack of run support - Kershaw only went 1-3 in 13 second-half starts. Kershaw is a star in the making, and he only turned 22 on March 19.

Ubaldo Jimenez won 15 games with a 3.47 ERA, 1.23 WHIP and 198 K. Jimenez was stronger in the second half with a 3.08 ERA and 1.12 WHIP. At 26, Jimenez has become that rare Colorado pitcher worth drafting high. This ground-ball pitcher actually likes pitching in Colorado – Jimenez’ career ERA at home is .80 lower than his road mark.

After winning 16 games with a 3.14 ERA and 201 K in 2008, Chad Billingsley was on a similar pace when he collapsed in the second half with a 5.20 ERA and 1.48 WHIP. Billingsley went from making the All-Star team to being left out of the postseason rotation. Billingsley did miss a start with a hamstring strain, but it is not clear how much the injury affected him.This spring, Billingsley says he has corrected a flaw in his delivery, which can put the 25-year-old back on the road to stardom.

TIER 5

Wandy Rodriguez’s ERA has dropped significantly the last four seasons: 5.64, 4.58, 3.54, 3.02. Along with ERA, Rodriguez shattered other career highs, finishing with14 wins, 1.24 WHIP and 193 K. Rodriguez continues to have a significant home/road split - 2.08 ERA and 1.06 WHIP at home vs. 4.05 ERA and 1.44 WHIP on the road. Rodriguez is 31, so it is not clear how much more he can improve.

Ricky Nolasco ended up with decent numbers, with one big exception. Nolasco had 13 wins, 1.25 WHIP and 195 K in 185 IP. But Nolasco also had a 5.06 ERA. Nolasco had such a miserable first part of the season that he got sent to the minors in late May with an ERA of 9.07. But Nolasco quickly returned and had an ERA of 3.82 the rest of the way. A return to 2008’s, 15 wins, 3.52 ERA and 1.10 WHIP seems attainable.

Matt Garza failed to build on his promising 2008, with one exception. Garza’s ERA and WHIP rose from 3.70 and 1.24 to 3.95 and 1.26. But Garza’s Ks soared to 189 in 203 IP. Garza has pitched much better at home in his two years in Tampa. Oddly enough, Garza’s lowest road ERA was 0.75 in two starts at Yankee Stadium and his third-best was 2.95 at Fenway. Lefties only batted .196 against the righthanded Garza, while righties hit .271. If Garza, 26, can do a little better against righties and on the road, he can become one of the AL’s best pitchers.

Photo by artolog.

The Honolulu Star-Bulletin reports that next to non-existent ticket sales have forced the cancellation of Manny Pacquaio’s planned concert Sunday at the Waikiki Shell:

“Only 603 tickets had been sold for the “Manny Pacquiao Live In Hawaii Concert Celebration” just days after more than 45,000 people - the largest crowd to see a fight in the U.S. in 17 years - watched Pacquiao retain his welterweight title against Joshua Clottey in Texas.”

Wow. Boxers usually wait until they are has-beens before they embarrass themselves with a stage show:

Actually, it’s not fair to refer to “Smokin’” Joe as a has-been. He and George Foreman are SportsChat’s favorites.That doesn’t mean Frazier isn’t embarrassing himself every time he takes the stage, but he has earned the right to be a little silly. He also probably needs the money.

Pac-Man, on the other hand, is in his prime.  There is no reason for this. How much money and attention does one man need?

Jake LaMotta didn’t do dinner theater because  he was an inspired thespian. He did it because he needed dinner. One of Pac-Man’s friends needs to be honest with the guy and tell him that while he can carry a tune, that doesn’t mean he is good enough to charge money based on his musical abilities any more then Sean Penn is qualified to headline a boxing PPV based on knocking out a few paparazzi.

Regardless, the people have spoken and they are about as interested in watching Pacquiao sing as they are in watching Adam Lambert Greco-Roman wrestle.

Actually, that would probably draw a pretty good crowd.

At the end of the day, it’s probably a good thing for Pacquaio to get this out of his system before he retires. This way he knows singing is not a fall-back career choice.

What do you think of Pacquiao’s pipes?

Would you pay to listen to this live?

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Not that UK’s basketball history isn’t every bit as glorious as that of Kansas. But as a sports fan living in Big XII country, SportsChat is used to seeing Kansas make mice of men.

It’s a tough decision, and President Obama displayed the kind of gritty decisiveness this country needs if we are going to make it through these tough times. We thank the President for his leadership.

The Bracket Buster in Chief predicted many an upset in the first round. Some of his picks make it very clear that he follows college hoops closely. He went out on a limb a few times, and once he might even have sprinkled in some Ivy League favoritism.

Not surprisingly, he chose ninth seeded Northern Iowa over  eight seeded UNLV in the Midwest. What will it take to get this guy to throw Las Vegas a bone?

Georgia Tech (10) over Oklahoma (7) in the Midwest is a solid pick in a tournament that so often showcases individual maestros conducting bracket busting symphonies. The Yellow Jacket’s Derrick Favors could be one such player.

SportsChat has been in love with his game since the McDonald’s All-America Dunk Contest last year:

Favors averaged 12.5 points and 8.5 rebounds per game his freshman season for G-Tech, but it’s the 6′10 forward’s length that makes him a difference maker. He averages 2.1 blocks per contest, and is a constant presence under the bucket. He is active, athletic and disruptive.

Now it’s true that Favors is not surrounded by much complementary talent. In fact, at times it has seemed like his guards were completely incapable of pushing the ball up the floor. But they looked sharp in the ACC tournament, losing by four in the championship game. Shrewd pick by el Presidente.

Missouri over Clemson is reasonable enough, but SportsChat really likes Cornell over Temple based solely on the fact that Temple is overrated every single year. This has been going on since Marc Macon. Also, didn’t Keith Olbermann go to Cornell? SportsChat smells a conspiracy.

Interestingly, Obama picked the nine seed to defeat the eight seed in all but one bracket. He chose the Texas Longhorns over the Wake Forest Demon Deacons in the East. While that seems reasonable on paper, the Longhorns have been playing nauseating basketball for a few months now. There is no reason to think that will change. Lucky for Obama, he has the ‘Horns going down to Kentucky in the second round.

The President’s most intriguing pick is Siena (13) over Purdue (4). The lesson here, is that lobbying does work:

It would be delightful to see the President’s Final Four picks pan out, if only to see Kansas face off against Kansas State. K-State is one of those teams that flies under the radar. That is what happens when you are from the version of Manhattan known as “The City that Always Sleeps.” But the President is right to respect these Wildcats. They are athletic and hungry. They can beat any team in the country on a given night. If they get a few bounces, they could go all the way.

The President sees Villanova edging out Duke for a ticket to the Final Four. It does seem to be a Big East year, but on the other hand, Obama liked K-State over the ‘Cuse. Maybe he is just pandering to the heartland.

It’s official. Europe has no culture. Well, except for David Beckham. People can say that Americans are fat, lazy and ignorant of the world around us. That may or may not be fair. But thanks to British poet laureate Carol Ann Duffy penning an ode to David Beckham, there is no longer anybody who can argue that we are any less cultured then the Euros.

Of course, Vlade Divac should have ended that argument for anyone paying attention years ago, but progress takes time.

Once your poet laureate has dedicated, we’ll say, 10-15 minutes of her time to write a poem about David Beckham, you pretty much lose the right to act snooty toward others’ cultural bonafides. And it’s not like this is the first time Becks has permeated Europe’s high culture. Lets not forget thousands of Spanish women lined up to watch a video of Becks sleeping at the Thyssen-Bornemisza museum in Madrid, Spain. Naturally, David Beckham condoms were available in the museum gift shop.

Now that is classy.

SportsChat visited England a few years ago and was told by more than several English-people that the US has no culture. I was told that in the US we speak “American” not English. I was scorned as if I had personally plotted the war in Iraq, even though England was right there with the US, and former-PM Tony Blair seemed to be sporting a woody every time he stood at the lectern next to W.

I was the ugly,  war-mongering American speaking broken English. Not only that, I am a Texan, so I had to put up with a few death penalty inquiries. I can only assume that if I had worn a necklace with a Star of David pendant on it, I would have had to defend Israel’s right to exist every time I got on the Tube.

I might not be able to pronounce “Leicester” without the aid of the guy in the ticket booth, but at least I know a pop-culture d-bag when I see one.

The average American might know as much about European politics as they do about the intricacies of String Theory, but at least we are not obsessed with a past-his prime athlete with the brains of a Spice Girl. The poet laureate of Great Britain found it suitable to compare Becks to mythical super hero Achilles. Get it? Because Becks hurt his heel too.

When a 34 year-old athlete tears his Achilles Tendon, it is not comparable to the death of a hero in one of the greatest literary works in history. In fact, the comparison pretty much defecates all over the greatness of the original work. It’s pretty much like romanticizing a 55 year-old man’s colonoscopy.

Duffy explained to the Mirror why she chose Becks as her muse:

“‘The public aspect of some lives provides a narrative, a story, for the rest of us to follow. We speak of ‘living the dream’, a ‘fairytale existence’ of ‘legends’ and of ‘heroes’.

“Like Greek Myths, such public lives can contain triumph and tragedy and in a way we all learn from them, as we do from Ovid, or the Brothers Grimm, or Shakespeare.

“The narrative of David Beckham’s public life is, I’m sure, far from over… but this poem is written in sympathy for this part of his story and to draw a parallel with Achilles, who gave his name to Beckham’s injury.’”

It is pretty clear that the English take David Beckham’s life a wee bit too seriously. It is easy to understand why the love him. He is a sports hero that looks like he was chiseled out of stone from Mt. Olympus. His wife even looks like something out of Greek mythology, and you have to give Becks credit for being open minded enough to marry a Gorgon. But that doesn’t make him any less of a buffoon every time he opens his mouth.

The bottom line is, Becks was rejected by America. He didn’t even manage to swing a hit reality show while he was here, which is next to impossible. Rumor has it that there were actually talks about a special episode of “Wife Swap” starring Becks and Will Smith, but Smith started and ended negotiations with an empatic, “Oh, hell no!”

Perhaps Duffy is just seeking attention. It’s not like anybody would be reading about her work if she just pumped out poems about Big Ben and parliament. Or maybe as the first female poet laureate in British history (The US has had seven female poet laureates), she felt the need to show her range.

But all she really showed was that for all of its pretension, Europe is just as dumbed down as the rest of the world.

Achilles (For David Beckham)
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Photo by Frisky Tuna

March Madness 2010: Syracuse Orange

Syracuse is always the team to watch in the NCAA tournament. It doesn’t matter if Jim Boeheim brings a roster loaded with NBA talent or scrappy no-names. The Syracuse Orange are consistently the most exciting team to watch in college basketball, and that is only amplified in the NCAA tournament.

But it’s always so hard to know which year they will be a bracket hit.

The ‘Cuse always seems to be a bracket savior or buster. There is no middle ground. It’s always hard to pick against Boeheim. But that respect can bite you in the butt if the Orange pull a disappearing act like they did against the Richmond Spiders in the first round of the 1991 tournament.

The problem is that Boeheim is a great coach every year, but the ebb and flow of recruiting has divided his tenure into very distinct eras. And even in the down times, it is always hard to resist penciling in an unlikely Syracuse run. And this ain’t a down time.

The roller coaster began in 1987 when a loaded Syracuse team led by Derrick Coleman lost what was possibly the greatest NCAA Championship Game of all time 74-73 to Indiana. Bobby Knight’s evil genius was reconfirmed, and Boeheim was marked as a guy who couldn’t win the big one.

Sanctions and the Lawrence Moten years led to nearly a decade of mediocrity. In the early 90’s it was easy to cross the Orange out as early round NCAA fodder. But just when you wrote them off, John Wallace lead Syracuse to the championship game in 1996 with nothing but guts and a roster full of roll players.

It instantly became harder for anybody who watched that team to ever bet against the Orange. At the end of the day, when you are filling out your brackets you choose one game at a time. And in an individual game, there is never a reason to think that Boeheim can’t figure out a way to win.

The ‘Cuse didn’t make it to the Elite 8 for seven more seasons after Wallace disappeared into the NBA. They won it all in 2003 with Carmelo Anthony, and Boeheim showed he can, in fact,  win the big one.

But in that seven year period between championship appearances, the ‘Cuse was up and down. They missed the tournament twice and never made it past the Sweet 16 when they did make it.

This year’s Syracuse team obviously falls into the “loaded” category, and anything short of a Final Four will be a disappointment. But a loss in the first round of the Big East tournament made it typically difficult to get a grasp on what type of team it is we have here. On the other hand, Wes Johnson might be the most exciting player in the country. He flows naturally within the offense like Carmelo Anthony before him.

It’s always hard to know when a Boeheim team is going to be bracket gold, but some simple math shows you that Syracuse is due.

This is definitely maybe Syracuse’s year.

If you are poking around to try and play catch up just for your brackets, you got to get to know Wes Johnson:

The kid is straight sick.

SportsRadioInterviews.com talks to Orange Coach Jim Boeheim about Syracuse’s late season struggles

Whether he had any doubt about getting a top seed in the tournament:

“Well I thought that we would be based on the year and what we done for the year.  We won the Big East by two games.  I think we had the best conference in the country again, tied with the Big Twelve maybe, but I thought that we had a great year and we deserved the one seed.”

Whether being a number two seed and choosing where you want to be is better than getting a number one seed in a bracket where you don’t want to be:

“I don’t know, I think a one seed is pretty good, but I think the difference in today’s tournament when you are a one seed, before you had an easy game, no longer. Vermont is a very good team.  I have watched them play over the weekend.  They are a good basketball team and there is just no easy games anymore.  I think the fact that we can play close to home in Buffalo helps a little bit but it is still a tough game and the second game that you can have, whoever wins our game, Gonzaga has been in the top ten for a lot of the year and Florida State is a very good team so that is the NCAA Tournament.  When you get in, you better be prepared to play well and that I think we are.  We have been very consistent this year.  We played good basketball even in our losses.  The last two losses that we had Georgetown shot 70% in the second half against us to beat us.  We played good basketball and I expect that we will play well in the tournament.”

The Daily Orange reports on the status of Arinze Onuaku

“A dose of bad news sprinkled on Syracuse’s parade Sunday. Arinze Onuaku, who suffered a right knee injury against Georgetown on Thursday, hasn’t healed as quickly as expected. Head coach Jim Boeheim said he doesn’t expect Onuaku to play this coming weekend in Buffalo.

No. 1 Orange will play No. 16 Vermont on Friday at the HSBC Arena.

‘It’d be hard for him to play on Friday if he can’t get to practice by Wednesday,” Boeheim said. “That’s where he is. It’s disappointing.’”

Syracuse Post Standard; For Wes Johnson, the first NCAA dance

“Like a little kid, he would watch the NCAA Tournament games and dream.

In the two years Wes Johnson spent at Iowa State before transferring to Syracuse University, the NCAA Tournament was just a dream. The Cyclones went 15-16 in his freshman year and followed that with a 14-18 mark in 2007-08.

“I just wanted to be a part of it,” Johnson said. “Watching all the crazy shots and buzzer shots and how the games go back and forth, I said, ‘I want to be a part of that.’”

The Sporting News calls Syracuse’s Scoop Jardine the Sixth Man of the Year

“Guard Scoop Jardine has not had the best season of the Syracuse players who open each game on the bench. But he is the Sporting News’ Sixth Man of the Year. Our qualifications for the award are different than those of the Big East or the NBA. To be considered, a player must not rank among his team’s top five in minutes played.

How can a guy be a team’s sixth man if he’s third in minutes, which is where the marvelous Kris Joseph ranks for the Orange?”

Tim Markowski of the Detroit News breaks down the field

“Syracuse. The Orange epitomize this unpredictable college basketball season. Unranked before the season, they could win it all. “

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Here’s the scoop. Earlier this week, Olney set the baseball world abuzz with his ESPN report that the Philadelphia Phillies were looking into trading Howard for St. Louis Cardinals superstar Pujols. The sportswriter claimed:

It’s the sort of thing that is much more likely to happen in fantasy baseball than in real life, but according to sources, an idea has been kicked around the Phillies’ organization internally, with discussions about proposing a swap of slugger Ryan Howard for St. Louis superstar Albert Pujols.

Pujols for Howard would be the blockbuster trade of year - make that the decade, if it were to happen. Only thing is, Olney’s sourcing for this was thin - about as slight as Edwar Ramirez’s physique.

You can’t even call what Olney wrote a trade “rumor,” as the word rumor would entail that two teams were talking about a deal. In this case, by Olney’s own admission, the discussion of the Phillies offering their first baseman for the Cardinals’ first baseman was simply an internal discussion among unknown Phillies front office folks. And this should have stayed that way.

As the blog The Daily Something put it, “Well, of course that’s been kicked around the Phillies organization. I’m sure that the Twins organization is all aflutter with talk of trading Nick Punto for Evan Longoria or Ryan Zimmerman. But the question is, why are we reporting on the Phillies staff’s wildest and most impossible dreams?”

Good question. Instead of just filing this tidbit away as an interesting rumor, Olney and ESPN blew up this nothing story into a future blockbuster deal, based on Olney’s anonymous sources, and based on his speculation on why such a lopsided deal would come to pass:

The logic for a Howard for Pujols swap, as discussed within the Phillies’ organization, could fall along these lines: Pujols, 30 years old, is eligible for free agency after the 2011 season, and early conversations about a contract extension have not led to any long-term deal. The expectation within baseball is that Pujols may ask for a deal that would rival, in annual value, the record-setting 10-year, $275 million deal that Alex Rodriguez negotiated with the Yankees in fall 2007.

Lots of “coulds” and “mays” here. If a blogger wrote something on such rampant speculation, he would be pilloried by the media. But in this case, MLB Network voice Peter Gammons came to Olney’s defense, writing on Twitter that “Buster Olney never wrote Howard-Pujols was hot, only that Phils talked what of among selves. Read before trashing.” As if basing such a huge story on Phillies’ water cooler talk somehow makes it okay.

Olney continued with his speculation on why such a deal could happen:

If the Cardinals were to decide, at any point, that they could not afford to sign Pujols, they could consider dealing him, in the way the Toronto Blue Jays traded Roy Halladay, or the Minnesota Twins traded Johan Santana.

Those analogies don’t make any sense here. In this case, Howard makes MORE than Pujols; he’s owed $39 million over the next two years, while Pujols will make $32 million. And both contracts are up at the same time, in 2011.

Look, I understand why the Phillies would want Pujols - every other team in baseball would love to have him. But why would the Cardinals trade away their franchise player for an inferior player who costs more, and whose contract is up at the exact same time? That makes no sense.

Olney suggests this reason:

Howard, who is just a couple of months older than Pujols, would not be a bad alternative. In the past four seasons, Howard has hit 198 homers and accumulated 572 RBIs, and has finished in the top five of the NL MVP race.

Here’s the public relations kicker: Howard was born in St. Louis, and is regarded as a hometown kid in that city.

Huh? As The Yankee Scrolls blog says:

How could the Cardinals possibly justify trading Pujols over money after they just gave nine digits to Matt Holliday? I know: by bringing back hometown hero Ryan Howard, who has a lot of RBIs!?!?!?! Who even knew Howard was from St. Louis before this story? I seriously doubt he’s so highly regarded that he would be seen as suitable return for THE GREATEST PLAYER OF THIS GENERATION.

Olney does acknowledge the payroll disparity between Howard and Pujols, saying that Howard “would be more expensive than Pujols in each of the next two seasons, but on the other hand, he probably will not be as expensive to sign as Pujols in his next contract.” Well, here’s a bright idea. If the Cardinals aren’t sure if they can re-sign Pujols, they could just keep the best player in baseball on their team for the next two years, and then sign Howard.

And Olney is supposed to be one of the most-respected voices in baseball? Good grief.

I mean, really. If some caller were to phone in with Olney’s trade scenario to any talk radio station in the country, how long would he last on the air before the host would hang up on him? Yet this story becomes national news - and forces the Phillies and Cardinals to have to issue denials. Unbelievable.

Aside from the fact that I have a hard time taking seriously a middle-aged man who still goes by the nickname of “Buster” (what, Skippy wasn’t available?) I have taken everything Olney says with a grain of salt ever since his “Last Night of the Yankee Dynasty” book came out. The cover of that tome showed Mariano Rivera on the mound at Yankee Stadium instead of in Arizona. If you’re going to suggest that the Yankee dynasty ended on Game 7 of the 2001 World Series, you might want to actually show Mo on that last night, instead of in pinstripes during a Bomber victory. Just like you might want to ask for the Phillies to confirm or deny on the record your rumors about them before writing a story about it. And they say bloggers go off half-cocked.

Photo courtesy of ESPN

Here’s the scoop. Earlier this week, Olney set the baseball world abuzz with his ESPN report that the Philadelphia Phillies were looking into trading Howard for St. Louis Cardinals superstar Pujols. The sportswriter claimed:

It’s the sort of thing that is much more likely to happen in fantasy baseball than in real life, but according to sources, an idea has been kicked around the Phillies’ organization internally, with discussions about proposing a swap of slugger Ryan Howard for St. Louis superstar Albert Pujols.

Pujols for Howard would be the blockbuster trade of year - make that the decade, if it were to happen. Only thing is, Olney’s sourcing for this was thin - about as slight as Edwar Ramirez’s physique.

You can’t even call what Olney wrote a trade “rumor,” as the word rumor would entail that two teams were talking about a deal. In this case, by Olney’s own admission, the discussion of the Phillies offering their first baseman for the Cardinals’ first baseman was simply an internal discussion among unknown Phillies front office folks. And this should have stayed that way.

As the blog The Daily Something put it, “Well, of course that’s been kicked around the Phillies organization. I’m sure that the Twins organization is all aflutter with talk of trading Nick Punto for Evan Longoria or Ryan Zimmerman. But the question is, why are we reporting on the Phillies staff’s wildest and most impossible dreams?”

Good question. Instead of just filing this tidbit away as an interesting rumor, Olney and ESPN blew up this nothing story into a future blockbuster deal, based on Olney’s anonymous sources, and based on his speculation on why such a lopsided deal would come to pass:

The logic for a Howard for Pujols swap, as discussed within the Phillies’ organization, could fall along these lines: Pujols, 30 years old, is eligible for free agency after the 2011 season, and early conversations about a contract extension have not led to any long-term deal. The expectation within baseball is that Pujols may ask for a deal that would rival, in annual value, the record-setting 10-year, $275 million deal that Alex Rodriguez negotiated with the Yankees in fall 2007.

Lots of “coulds” and “mays” here. If a blogger wrote something on such rampant speculation, he would be pilloried by the media. But in this case, MLB Network voice Peter Gammons came to Olney’s defense, writing on Twitter that “Buster Olney never wrote Howard-Pujols was hot, only that Phils talked what of among selves. Read before trashing.” As if basing such a huge story on Phillies’ water cooler talk somehow makes it okay.

Olney continued with his speculation on why such a deal could happen:

If the Cardinals were to decide, at any point, that they could not afford to sign Pujols, they could consider dealing him, in the way the Toronto Blue Jays traded Roy Halladay, or the Minnesota Twins traded Johan Santana.

Those analogies don’t make any sense here. In this case, Howard makes MORE than Pujols; he’s owed $39 million over the next two years, while Pujols will make $32 million. And both contracts are up at the same time, in 2011.

Look, I understand why the Phillies would want Pujols - every other team in baseball would love to have him. But why would the Cardinals trade away their franchise player for an inferior player who costs more, and whose contract is up at the exact same time? That makes no sense.

Olney suggests this reason:

Howard, who is just a couple of months older than Pujols, would not be a bad alternative. In the past four seasons, Howard has hit 198 homers and accumulated 572 RBIs, and has finished in the top five of the NL MVP race.

Here’s the public relations kicker: Howard was born in St. Louis, and is regarded as a hometown kid in that city.

Huh? As The Yankee Scrolls blog says:

How could the Cardinals possibly justify trading Pujols over money after they just gave nine digits to Matt Holliday? I know: by bringing back hometown hero Ryan Howard, who has a lot of RBIs!?!?!?! Who even knew Howard was from St. Louis before this story? I seriously doubt he’s so highly regarded that he would be seen as suitable return for THE GREATEST PLAYER OF THIS GENERATION.

Olney does acknowledge the payroll disparity between Howard and Pujols, saying that Howard “would be more expensive than Pujols in each of the next two seasons, but on the other hand, he probably will not be as expensive to sign as Pujols in his next contract.” Well, here’s a bright idea. If the Cardinals aren’t sure if they can re-sign Pujols, they could just keep the best player in baseball on their team for the next two years, and then sign Howard.

And Olney is supposed to be one of the most-respected voices in baseball? Good grief.

I mean, really. If some caller were to phone in with Olney’s trade scenario to any talk radio station in the country, how long would he last on the air before the host would hang up on him? Yet this story becomes national news - and forces the Phillies and Cardinals to have to issue denials. Unbelievable.

Aside from the fact that I have a hard time taking seriously a middle-aged man who still goes by the nickname of “Buster” (what, Skippy wasn’t available?) I have taken everything Olney says with a grain of salt ever since his “Last Night of the Yankee Dynasty” book came out. The cover of that tome showed Mariano Rivera on the mound at Yankee Stadium instead of in Arizona. If you’re going to suggest that the Yankee dynasty ended on Game 7 of the 2001 World Series, you might want to actually show Mo on that last night, instead of in pinstripes during a Bomber victory. Just like you might want to ask for the Phillies to confirm or deny on the record your rumors about them before writing a story about it. And they say bloggers go off half-cocked.

Photo courtesy of ESPN

March Madness 2010: Kentucky Wildcats

A lot of people are talking about what a tough draw the East bracket was for the Kentucky Wildcats.

A lot of people are wrong.

Kentucky is head and shoulders above every team in their bracket, and to pretend otherwise is just silly.

Freshmen DaMarcus Cousins and John Wall help make the Wildcats the most talented team in the East Region. It won’t be a cake walk, but West Virgina at the two seed, New Mexico at the three seed and Wisconsin at the four is about as good as you can hope for. Temple is the number five seed in the East. Is there anybody out there who can say they don’t think Kentucky would beat the Owls 99 times out of 100? Is there anybody out there that really thinks the Wildcats can’t handle The Mountaineers, Lobos or Badgers?

A lot of people are pointing to a potential second round match-up between Kentucky and the Texas Longhorns. SportsChat keeps reading about how enigmatic Texas has become since falling from number one to being booted out of the Top 25 and into an eighth seed.

Let SportsChat help you solve the riddle. Pundits are busy wondering which Texas team is going to show up for March Madness, as if there is a choice between good and bad. The Longhorns are straight up bad. The truth is that Texas is not as talented as advertised, they are consistently over-matched  and they have no chemistry. Besides that, they are okay. At times it has looked like neither the players nor Longhorn Coach Rick Barnes even want to be in the building.

So don’t believe the hype. If the Wildcats can’t steamroll the Longhorns like Kansas, Texas A&M, Baylor, Kansas State, Oklahoma and just about every other team with a pulse in the Big XII did this year, they shouldn’t be a number one seed.

Kentucky has gotten better as the season has gone on. They have a lot of freshmen, but these days,that’s a good thing. A team that is deep in juniors and seniors just means that they are a team that is not stocked with NBA talent.

And that is why SportsChat thinks Kentucky is going to make it to the championship to face off against Kansas.

In order to make it through the field of 64, a team need a go-to guy on offense. Kentucky has plenty of that in John Wall. But what makes them for real is DeMarcus Cousins cleaning the offensive glass.

Check out Cousins grabbing this Wall miss to send the SEC Tournament Championship Game into overtime:

Basically, having Cousins on the blocks with Wall attacking the rim is equivalent to having full insurance coverage on a brand new Porsche. And unless they drive off a cliff, these Cats are going to be playing for the title.

Sadly, it won’t matter once Kentucky Coach John Calipari is caught doing something slimy and the team’s results are expunged from the record books. It’s what he does. Does anybody really think this can end any other way?

Kentucky Wildcat Highlights from the 2010 season:

John Wall Highlights:

In case you’re not in love yet, John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins/ All SEC Baby-Sitting first team:

Follow Kentucky Wildcat Coach John Calipari on Twitter

Round One Match-Up; East Tennessee State

What you need to know about East Tennessee State:

“Minutes before East Tennessee State learned its NCAA Tournament destination, university president Paul Stanton took the Millennium Centre podium and exhorted the Buccaneers to win “several more” games.

Stanton’s admonition may have run into a Big Blue dose of reality.

The Atlantic Sun Conference champions drew an expected No. 16 seed and were paired with top-seeded Kentucky in an East Regional opener Thursday at New Orleans Arena.”

The Kentucky Kernel on East Tennessee State

“The Buccaneers average ten less points than UK a game, ESTU made the tournament in 2009, but hasn’t advanced past the first round since 1992. Won conference tournament to get to NCAAs.”

What the experts are predicting:

TheSportsGeek.com

“Needless to say, the Kentucky Wildcats are the clear cut favorite to come out of the East Region in this year’s tournament. A talented bracket, however the Wildcats and their super Freshman John Wall have been too dominate this year to fall short in this year’s tournament. The Wildcats have been a dominant 32-2 on the year, beating Mississippi State in the Finals of the SEC Tournament this past weekend to solidify a #1 seed for this tournament. Freshmen John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins will hopefully lead this team all the way to the Final Four, and anything short of that will be a major disappointment for this program that has waited for their chance to once again be a powerhouse come March. Take Kentucky to reign supreme and come out of the Eastern Region of the tournament.”

Dick Vitale:

“Hey, basketball enthusiasts, cutting the nets down in Peyton Manning country will be John Calipari and his Kentucky Wildcats. I love their winner’s mentality and their tandem of John Wall on the perimeter and DeMarcus Cousins in the post. They are the best diaper-dandy duo since Michigan’s Jalen Rose and Chris Webber. Many observers would point out the ‘Cats inexperience. and I certainly respect those observations. However, something tells me that with the magical motivational skills of Calipari and Wall’s scintillating talent, Kentucky will find a way to bring happiness to their passionate legion of fans.”

Lexington Herald-Leader Columnist Mark Story

“Predictions for the NCAA Tournament:

Final Four

Kansas. Will wear down Ohio State in the Midwest Region finals.

Syracuse. Should benefit from playing teams not familiar with attacking Jim Boeheim’s famed 2-3 zone.

Kentucky. Does not have an easy path but in John Wall, DeMarcus Cousins and Patrick Patterson, the Cats do have the most talented trio on the same team in the country.

Villanova. Yes, dapper Jay Wright’s lads slumped in February, but they are toughened from having played in the Big East and have the secret to tournament success, veteran guards (take a bow Scottie Reynolds).”

“Kentucky. Will win the national title.”

Stories about the 2010 Wildcats from around the web:

Jerry Tipton/ Lexington Herald-Leader; Are these freshman more than Fab?

“Freshmen accounted for all 11 of Kentucky’s points in the overtime victory over Mississippi State in the Southeastern Conference Tournament finals Sunday. Players that UK Coach John Calipari likes to say were playing AAU basketball less than a year ago scored 27 of the team’s final 29 points.

In a highly charged atmosphere and against an opponent playing for its NCAA Tournament life, freshmen executed down the stretch. An intentional free throw miss. A clutch steal to ignite a late rally. A putback at the buzzer to send the game into overtime. Seven makes in 10 free-throw attempts in the final three minutes of regulation and five-minute overtime.”

Johnson City Press on hometown East Tennessee State’s chances against Kentucky

“A 16-seed has never won a tournament game, although the Bucs have challenged that history more than once. They lost to Oklahoma by a point back in 1989, and last season threatened Pittsburgh the whole way before falling 72-62.

The latter bears some resemblance to this assignment. The Panthers were the big, bad team from the Big East that no one was particularly eager to play.

The Bucs not only stayed close in Dayton, Ohio. They had a legitimate chance to win before last-minute free throws pushed the final margin to 10.”

Mark DeCourcy/ TheSportingNews.com; Is Wall the best freshman ever?

“This was bound to be the next frontier once we embraced the notion that Wall’s ability supersedes the spectacular standard established by Derrick Rose. At Memphis two seasons ago, Rose set the current standard for freshman point guards, but Wall arrived with a stronger sense of confidence about who he is and what he is in college to accomplish.

The next logical step is to wonder if Wall compares to the best of freshmen: Kevin Durant at Texas, Chris Jackson at LSU, Phil Ford at North Carolina, Kenny Anderson at Georgia Tech, Mark Aguirre at DePaul.

With the limited information eight games provides, Wall would be the choice over any of them.”

Charles P. Pierce/Slate.com; The Sleaziest Coach in the Sleaziest Game

“Here’s the other reason: Even if Kentucky wins, historical precedent says that, sooner or later, they won’t win. For example, in 1996, a 35-2 University of Massachusetts team coached by John Calipari made it all the way to the Final Four. A year later, because of a tangled scandal involving Marcus Camby, jewelry, and hookers, the NCAA stripped UMass of its tournament victories, forced the school to pay back $151,617 in tournament revenues, and expunged the team’s accomplishments from the official record book. Then, in 2008, a 38-2 Memphis team coached by John Calipari made it all the way to the championship game. A year later, because of a tangled scandal involving papier-mâché SAT scores, the NCAA stripped Memphis of its tournament victories, forced the school to pay back more than $500,000 in tournament revenues, and expunged the team’s accomplishments from the official record book.”

University of Kentucky student newspaper the Kentucky Kernel on The Wildcats’ March Madness Draw

“DeMarcus Cousins’ face said it all.

Sure, the Cats had earned their No. 1 seed they had been fighting for all season, but the draw that came with it had the Southeastern Conference Freshman of the Year ready for another fight.

Watching from UK head coach John Calipari’s house in Lexington just hours after beating Mississippi State in the SEC Championship, the team let out a collective “Ooooooohhhhhh” when Texas, formerly ranked No. 1 in the country, was announced as the No. 8 seed and potential second round matchup against UK.

‘They setting us up,” an incredulous Cousins said. “They are setting us up.’”

Watch Coach Calipari’s Press Conference

Yahoo.com feature on DeMarcus Cousins

“A first-team All-American pick by Yahoo! Sports, Cousins averages 15.3 points and 10.1 rebounds for the Wildcats - numbers that are even more phenomenal when you consider he plays just 23 minutes per game.

Still, along with being one of college basketball’s most efficient players, Cousins is also one of the most enigmatic, polarizing figures the game has seen in years.

Some teams devise schemes to try to stop Cousins while others resort to hacking away at his arms, ribs and groin. One fan may think Cousins is a whiner and a baby for complaining to the officials. Another sees passion and a desire to win.”

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One by one, Tiger Woods is slowly being abandoned by his sponsors. The one man corporation is downsizing significantly. When Gatorade recently axed him, it was a sign that Tiger is going to be facing significant challenges if he wants to reclaim his advertising throne.

SportsChat has kindly compiled a list of companies that Woods’ people need to meet with if they want Tiger’s endorsement career back on the right track.

In no particular order:

Trojan Magnum Female Condoms

This one would be so much easier if Tiger actually wore condoms. Then we could simply go with the tagline “”I know eventually you’ll be talking to the press, and when you do, tell ‘em I wear Magnum.” It would be a match made in heaven.

But since a lot of Tiger’s lovers say he doesn’t use prophylactics, it might be necessary to get creative. Female condoms have been in use in Europe since 1992. Trojan could blaze a trail by introducing their super-sized product to the female market. Tiger’s tagline: “Wear one. Because I sure as hell won’t. And believe me, I got shit.”

PMemory.com’s “School of Phenomenal Memory”

When your social life is active, it can get hard to keep everything in order. Every player knows you always have to remember a pretty girl’s name because you never know when you might run into her again. When you get to Tiger’s level, it is almost impossible not to scream the wrong name at just the wrong time. According to all published reports, Tiger did a great job of making all of his ladies feel like they were the only one. Well, the only one besides his wife. Tiger would be straight money for PMemory:

“Oh, believe me, it works,” Tiger would say in the infomercial. “On Monday I was with Rachel, Kalika and Jamie. Tuesday,  I did Jamie twice in the morning before hitting up the other Jamie, doubling back for a stab at Kalika and then cuddling up with Mindy. Wednesday it was Cori, Rachel, Mindy, Kalika, Joclyn, Holly and then back to Jamie. Thursday was the same as Wednesday, but I squeezed Theresa in between Rachel and Mindy. On Friday I spent the day with Elin and the kids. You see, it’s just that easy.”

Atari

One of them introduced gaming to millions of homes across America. The other brought golf into millions of American living rooms for the first time. Both have seen better days.

Because of his various infidelities, Tiger has been exiled into the endorsement wilderness. And because they screwed millions of children when they released “ET the Extra-Terrestrial” back in 1982, Atari has been relegated to the landfill of video game history.

The best part is that Tiger can probably just buy the entire company for the price of one original game console. And that is how you build job security.

Powerade

This one is a no-brainer.

Gatorade just dropped Tiger Woods, which seems like a mistake from a business perspective. At this point, it’s hard to think that stamina and energy aren’t Tiger’s best selling points. This partnership would be win/win for Powerade.

As of right now, the only time anybody drinks Powerade is when it is given away for free at some sort of an athletic event like a 5k. When given the choice, nobody chooses Powerade over Gatorade. Nobody. Powerade is the poor man’s Pepsi of the electrolyte replenishment business. If we drank sports drinks with our meals, you would be getting a lot of “Sorry, we don’t have Gatorade. Is Powerade ok?” from your waiter/waitress.

Seeing as signing LeBron James to an endorsement deal didn’t really change these fundamental facts, it remains to be seen if Tiger could elevate Powerade from its perch at the lowest rung of the second tier.  But at a discount, it could be a shrewd move to lock up Tiger before his inevitable “We Forgive You” comeback tour sweeps the nation.

LogoSportswear.com’s Break-Away Pants

The simple fact is that if it weren’t for break-away pants, Tiger Woods wouldn’t be able to keep his hectic schedule. Logo Sportswear would be a good chance for Tiger to get in on the ground floor of an independent apparel designer. And we hear they have hot receptionists. Score.

Spokesman for Frolf.com

We hesitate to suggest this because it’s hard to believe anything could sell frolf better then the dorky looking guy in khaki hiking gear jabbering into his cell phone on the Frolf.com home page. But Tiger is worth the gamble.

This endorsement might not pull in the big bucks, but it would do wonders for Tiger’s public image. It is just impossible to imagine a woman having sex with a frolf enthusiast.

Erotic Golf - The Musical!

With so many advertising doors closing, maybe Tiger should dip into the music industry. Comedy-Afrobeat-Techno group Erotic Golf is the perfect place for him to get started.

Granted, Erotic Golf’s music sounds like somebody is swinging a cat with a filthy mouth around their head as fast as possible. But it’s hard to believe that if Tiger stopped by the studio to throw a few Wyclef-esqu random shout-outs onto the track “Purple Pussy Anthem,” it wouldn’t shoot straight to the top of the charts.

Axe Body Spray

If Tiger Woods would simply blame all these chicks throwing themselves at him on his Axe Body Spray, he would be right back in the game. It’s just that simple.

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Check out more Tiger Wood’s fantasy products at PipeDreamProducts.com