LeBron James has been putting a lot of thought into it, and he thinks every player in the NBA who wears the number 23 should give it up to honor Michael Jordan.

“I just think what Michael Jordan has done for the game has to be recognized in some way-soon,” James said. “There would be no LeBron James, no Kobe Bryant(notes), no Dwyane Wade(notes), you name all the best players in the league right now and the last 10 years, there would be none of us without Michael Jordan.”

First of all, this has to be the first humble gesture ever made where the gesturer refers to himself in the third person.

“It’s time,” James said. “He’s the best basketball player we’ve ever seen. Mike does it on the court and off the court. If you see 23, you think about Michael Jordan. You see guys flying through the air, you think about Michael Jordan. You see game-winning shots, you think about Michael Jordan. You see fly kicks, you think about Michael Jordan. He did so much, it has to be recognized, and not just by putting him in the Hall of Fame.”

I also find it pretty humorous that he thinks the number 23 is sacred enough to permanently retire league-wide due to the unparalleled accomplishments of MJ, but he also saw fit to choose it for himself in the first place.

None the less, it is a great idea and a wonderful gesture. Yes, people will complain that other former NBA stars are equally or more deserving, but MJ gave the NBA an explosive sizzle it has held onto ever since. He changed the game and a lot more. Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points in a game and averaged 50 and 25 over the course of a season, but MJ was the ambassador that brought the NBA to the furthest corners of the earth. He didn’t win as many championships as Russell, but he changed the way Madison Avenue does business forevermore. Just as Jerry West is known as the official logo of the NBA, the number 23 should be hung in every stadium as homage to how great the NBA can be.

That doesn’t mean there are a lot of other great players who shouldn’t be remembered through some sort of retirement gesture. There are many other things the league should retire, such as the hated Thunder Sticks and teams playing the first three quarters of every regular season game like their mommies forced them to go to their basketball game when they really wanted to stay home and be LeBron on Playstation. But that is not so much out respect for the past as it is respect for the fans.

Here are some other things that should be left to the legends:

The Afro - This one is a no-brainer. The afro belongs to Dr. J. It’s just that simple. A lot of players have rocked it, and the hairstyle itself actually led the ABA in rebounding three times in the mid-’70’s, but nobody owned the ‘fro like Dr. J.

Some of the players this would affect:

Ben Wallace, Moochie Norris (OK, he’s not in the league anymore, but as he is the only player to ever parlay a ‘fro into a 50 million dollar contract, he makes the list.), Ricky Davis, Michael Beasley, Fletch

Endorsing Clothing Lines - Check out this Larry Bird commercial for Chadon Bluejeans and tell me there is a player in the NBA who could throw on a pair of skin-tight, pseudo-designer jeans like Bird did in this commercial:

Was that a body double on that last shot, or did Larry just say, “Fuck it. I haven’t been running suicides every morning for the last 20 years to not show off my ass.”? Either way, the NBA should strongly consider banning players from ever doing anything like this again.

Some players this would affect:

Pretty much all of them. Or at least all the ones with an annoying cousin who won’t get off their dick about what a great idea it would be for them to start their own clothing line. After all, what grown man doesn’t need a hoodie with a silhouette of Chris Bosh’s face on the back of it? Kinda makes him look like Che’.

Declaring Too Many Willis Reed Moments- This one is on the announcers. Every time a player is treated for an injury during a playoff game, the announcers wonder if it will be a “Willis Reed Moment” when the player reenters the court via the tunnel to the dressing room. Because there is no other way for a player to get to the court, superficially, it is an easy comparison to make. But they seem to forget that Willis Reed was inspiring his team to a game seven win in the NBA championship against the Lakers, not coming back to the floor during a first round series against them.

Some players this would affect:

Well, ok, maybe just Yao Ming. And it is still heart wrenching to see the big fella wincing in pain knowing how much he wants to help his teammates. But there will never be another table set for a moment quite like Willis’s.

Daisy Dukes/Ho Shorts/Nut Huggers - Nobody kept viewing audiences in fear of seeing an accidentally revealed testicle like John Stockton. Luckily, he didn’t have great hang time. Sure, entire eras worth of players also exposed their tan-lines similarly, but Stockton wore his hooker shorts long after the Fab Five introduced the world to baggy gear. These days, when you think nut huggers, you think John Stockton. Today’s players need to respect that.

Players this would affect:

None of them, thankfully. Although after seeing LeBron in his hipster gear on TNT last weekend, nothing would surprise me.

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