Last Wednesday I squeezed my way into a cantina in downtown Mexico City and tried to be on my best behavior. The Mexican national soccer team was going to play the United States in a crucial World Cup qualifying match, yet I was unsure until the last moment who I would root for. Don’t talk too loud, I instructed myself. Observe and mimic the rituals around you.
I am a U.S. citizen, born and raised on the border, but being Mexican American, and living in Mexico now, makes for a deep bipolarity when it comes to this rivalry. People live and breathe for soccer in Mexico, a do-or-die sort of relationship to the sport. Especially lately, when everything else in this country seems to be teetering on the brink. To the north, the Americans are becoming one of the world’s most exciting football teams, gradually building a tradition of excellence – true to the American way.
When you are born on the U.S. side but live with Mexican sensibilities, you can be naturally torn when these two storied teams take to the field. It’s the old “hyphenated American” push-and-pull. Root for the red, white, and blue? Or the tricolor?
I decided to play it extra-safe. On the day of the match, I wore a blue T-shirt, as an American, but lucky green socks, for Mexico. During the game, though, it didn’t take long to pick a side. Charlie Davies scored a goal for the United States in the first 10 minutes of the game, the first time ever the U.S. has led in play over Mexico at the gargantuan and mythical Estadio Azteca. When it happened, I felt instant devastation and rage, along with the others around me who were cursing the screen and throwing their hands in the air. Soon after, Mexico responded with a goal of its own — a blasting shot by Israel Castro — and I joined in the whooping and screaming.
No one around me seemed to mind that I did so in English. I had found my team.
Mexico needs me right now, I told myself, throwing back beers with other self-identified pochos. Swine flu, a faltering economy, the bloody drug war, and that border shared with a vast and powerful juggernaut called the United States of America. This was serious business. By half-time, when the score sat ominously at 1-1, the game felt like an epic struggle against an invading army.
Think about it. The U.S. long ago supplanted the role previously held by Spain in Mexico’s pantheon of national boogeymen: the imperial oppressor. A rising and powerful U.S. football squad marching into the temple of tradition-bound Mexican soccer corresponds perfectly to the rivalry’s imperial logic. And if in 2009 there is one place where Mexico refuses to be kicked around anymore by the U.S. – as it has been, ahem, for much of the last decade – it’s on the soccer field.
I did not feel like a traitor to the nation of my birth when I cheered on Mexico to its victory last week, not a bit. Think of it as an expression of cultural flexibility. Back home in the States, a Mexican American or Mexican immigrant is perpetually considered an outsider. Like many Latinos of many nations and colors, it is how we are perceived, no matter how acculturated we might be. Even though we are rocketing off into space as astronauts and joining the ranks of Supreme Court justices, Latinos can’t seem to shake the mainstream impression that we are a people apart. Mexicans, thanks to historical proximity, make up the far majority of U.S. Latinos. And with the enormous influx of immigrants into the United States from Mexico in the last two decades, mainstream society has plenty of material to refresh the lingering impression that we will always be different.
No wonder anti-immigrant attack dogs look to the wild expressions of Mexican cultural nationalism at U.S.-Mexico soccer matches in the States as evidence that “the Mexicans” will never truly assimilate. That’s a self-generating cycle. The more Mexicans are ostracized and demonized in the American mainstream, often to the point of death, the more so many will be pushed to root for the official opponent – Mexico – in their adopted country. It’s the same reasoning for why so many of us raised Mexican instead of U.S. flags during the immigrant-rights marches of 2006. To the ire, of course, of utterly scandalized fellow Americans.
All of this could make you enormously depressed, or, as I see it, proud of your options. No matter what the broader American culture says to us, the U.S. is just as much mine as anyone else’s. That means – if I’m to believe the marketing – that I have two cultures to draw from, two languages, two histories, and two teams to root for. In this case, my ties to Mexico make it easy to step out of that in-between space and cheer on the red, white, and green. Maybe some cousins or Mexican American college friends will go the other way, and that’s the beauty of it.
People can label this flexibility some sort of betrayal all they want. The way I see it, nothing says I’m proud and comfortable with being an American more than this: Wearing blue and green, a bilingual, bicultural U.S. Latino, living abroad in Mexico, cheering on a worthy and familiar rival, for the sake of the sport.
… Um. For now, I mean. The road to the World Cup next year in South Africa is long and far from over. And I gotta say, the United States, my other native country, is still lookin’ pretty good …
* Photo above, a Mexican American’s 1998 vintage World Cup jersey, proudly worn in victory around Mexico City, August 12, 2009.
More on these topics:
binational, culture, empire, football, immigration, mexico, politics, reflections, rivalry, soccer, sports, united_states, violence
DCP says:
Cool story. I can relate.
Richard says:
While quite possibly a very lazy reason, my affection for El Tri developed latently over the years, since growing up and watching Mexican soccer on KMEX with my grandfather.
I spent many years since 1994 being marketed an anemic and not very exciting American program that offended my received sensibilities about futbol. Whatever (of the many) gripes I have against the FMF, there is just something more exciting, fun, and outright ecstatic about watching El Tricolor than the Yanks.
It doesn't mean that I can't and don't appreciate the American contribution to the game. But it doesn't appeal to my heart. It lacks a certain poetry, which I hope develops over time. But my love for El Tri is pretty firm; I'm not very torn. Living as a Laker fan in Boston, I'm used to the grilling I would receive from US partisans about liking the hated rival and not the 'home team'.
The rivalry is exactly what the area needs to elevate the level of the game in the region. But there's really quite nothing like the sound of a crowd at a sold-out Azteca (or any place where they are the local) going nuts after a Mexican goal. Oh, and the game-calling in Spanish is infinitely better.
soledadenmasa says:
Daniel,
It's a 1998 World Cup jersey. There was no World Cup in 1988.
Luis says:
A nice piece of article about an extremely sensitive issue. As a Spaniard with relatives in South America, I nevertheless venture to take issue with the view that Spain was just an opressor. Did it conquer Mexico? Yes, with the help of thousands of Indians opressed by the Aztecs. Did the conquistadores commit atrocities? Yes, but they also built a wonderful mixed civilization which up to the XVIII century was superior to their neighbours to the North. And well, about that Black legend of the genocide there is an obvious answer. You go to Mexico, Peru, Bolivia, Ecuador or you name the country and you will see millions of Indians and mestizos. HOw many Indians or mestizos do you see North of Rio Grande? Almost none, the anglos did commit a real genocide and being racists by nature they did not mix with the locals. That is the difference.
La Chilangabacha says:
"Maybe some cousins or Mexican American college friends will go the other way, and that’s the beauty of it."
Or fellow bloggers. I also couldn't decide who to root for until the very last minute so I bought a blue hat for a local soccer club called "America," as in "Latin ___" or "United States of___." But when the USA scored at the beginning of the match I was elated and felt an overwhelming sense of happiness to be able to cheer for them right in the middle of Estadio Azteca.
And yea, I was still pretty happy to see my adopted paisanos have a chance to celebrate.
Lets start a pocho soccer team.
Daniel Hernandez says:
Good idea!!
Daniel Hernandez says:
PS, here's a great photo-story by a San Francisco photojournalist who was in the stands (well, the cage) for the U.S. side: http://douglaszimmerman.blogspot.com/2009/08/united-states-mens-national-team-vs.html
Luis says:
at least your back where you belong, because up north us Latinos who live the american dream day in and day out suffer because of people like you. Same people that show no respect or dignity for there HOME. Its people like you that cry Racism the 1st time an anglo tells you to obey the laws. YES in america we have laws, even laws that allow POS like you to disrespect our flag and our nation. People who break the laws, those are outsiders, no matter what color there skin is. If you choose not to adapt to the american culture then thats on you, not every latino feels that way. I came to the US when i was 2 and I have worked for everything I have, I don't expect a hand out, or a "hey latino brother come to my picnic". Latinos are great people but we are no better than the asian, anglo, africans, or muslims. We each have our own strenghs and weakness, but one weakness of a latino is that they want everything handed to them in a silver plater or else they are being discrmitated against. Start looking at people for what they are and not there color, or else you are no better than the people you think are out to get you.
the old saying is LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT, will I for one am very happy you have left, because you don't belong here, not because your mexican or mexican american, but because you don't understand what the american dream is all about.
Jennifer Doyle says:
Great article! It was a tremendous game - in no small part because of the drama brought to it by the hyphenation that supports the sport in the US. Can't wait for the next time the two teams meet up....
Soccer-es-futbol-es-Life says:
Daniel,
Support the El-Tri all you want while you live in Mexico but when you come back you have got to root for us/US. All you need to do to convince yourself is to replace US for Mexico in your article and base your premiss on SOCCER only. We are the third world soccer nation that does not get love from are neighbors to the south. We are the one that need your support to elevate this game to it's rightful level in this country. And you know tough that is given a certain newspaper you may have worked at. LA Times anyone?
Peace-Paz
EE UU, EE UU, EE UU de America
Felipe says:
Luis,
Chill man, what the hell is your problem?
You say:
>>Its people like you that cry Racism the 1st time an anglo tells you to obey the laws
Seriously man, I think the only racist in here is you. It is because America has such freedoms that we can root for any country that makes it great. And yes, americans are or were some of the most racist people on earth. Thankfully this has been changing over several decades of civil rights movement. It is not because of people like you that this country is great. Rather you are an example of a horrible american.
JP says:
@Luis
It's true that the Conquistadores had thousands of indian allies, but the Spaniards repaid those allies by treating them in the same manner as their enemies and forcing them into an encomienda system (another form of slavery). I also object to the description of colonized Mexico ("New Spain" at the time) as a "wonderful mixed civilization" when the ruling class was exclusively comprised of Spaniards and the vast majority of the population were relegated to a peasant class. Yes, there are more Indigenous people in Mexico today than in the US. However, Spaniards never emigrated to Mexico in the same numbers as Europeans emigrated to the US, therefore displacing the native population wasn't as much of a priority. Despite their smaller numbers, the Spaniards certainly managed to cause a lot of destruction throughout the North and South American continents. It's unrealistic to expect Mexicans to simply gloss over the darkest of dark chapters in their history especially when Spaniards still refer to that period as their "Golden Age".