I recently took a long vacation with my family to Portland, Oregon, foremost to celebrate my brother’s college graduation, but perhaps more importantly — we being a family of New Orleanians — to do as much Pacific Northwest eating as we could manage. And I have to say, the food scene in PDX is inspiring. Plenty of high-quality, local organic product, talented cooks gunning for culinary innovation and fun, and, best of all, a low cost of operation that makes it easy for an up-and-coming chef to take a few chances on a new restaurant. If the proof of this experiment’s success isn’t in the pudding, per se, it was definitely in the outstanding ono ceviche we enjoyed at Andina, the grass-fed and finished strip steak at Urban Farmer, and of course the spiced boar collar and fish sauce fried chicken wings at Pok Pok. As I said: Outstanding. But it was on my last night of the trip, mere hours away from boarding a red-eye flight back to New York, that I confronted one of the most outrageously ballsy menu items I’d ever seen in my life. At the diminutive, elegant Le Pigeon, listed nonchalantly among the other appetizers, was this:
Foie gras jelly donut, $16
No way…could it really be? I spoke the words aloud, just to make sure something in my cranium wasn’t all tangled up like an Oliver Sacks patient, causing me to see things that weren’t actually there. ”Foie. Gras. Jelly. Donut,” I said. And then, “Holy shit.” Now, I normally try not to swear in front of my parents, but some things just have to be said. I needed to order it - the decision was made as soon as I saw the words. I wasn’t really even in the mood for it, but when confronted with something so outrageous, all will power is lost. It’s as though the menu had performed the Jedi mind-trick on me: “You will have the foie gras jelly donut.” ”I will have the foie gras jelly donut.” When the server came to take our orders, I pointed at the menu and asked, simply, “Seriously?” ”Oh, yes,” he said. Oh well, I thought. I guess we’re going to do this.
When my appetizer arrived, it was both exactly and absolutely nothing like I’d expected. The fatty liver wasn’t incorporated into the donut — it wasn’t a foie-filled pastry — nor was it some sort of mousse cleverly disguised as chocolate frosting. There was no subtlety about the dish at all, which made it that much more brazen. It was, quite literally, a house made jelly donut topped with a generous lobe of seared foie gras, with yet another lobe of foie on the side. It was fried fat topped with seared fat, plain as can be. Just in case you don’t believe me, I have photographic evidence:
[Star of the hit new Fox reality show: When Appetizers Kill!]
When I’ve told people about this, once their incredulity subsides, they always ask, “Did you like it?” Well, yes, of course I liked it. Animal fat — particularly of the engorged liver variety — has a way of injecting itself directly into the pleasure centers of your brain, not unlike a marvelous drug. Which is pretty much the reaction I had after consuming the thing, an intense wave of pleasure followed not long thereafter by a sudden crash, and feelings of embarrassment and guilt. As I sat there, dazed and sweating, I felt hung-over, bordering on ashamed. ”Dear Lord,” I whispered, “what have I done to myself? I still have an entree coming! Will I survive?”
Which is not to say that it wasn’t a uniquely wonderful experience. Le Pigeon’s executive chef, Gabriel Rucker — a 2007 Food and Wine Best New Chef — clearly knew what he was doing. He’s become part of a new breed of cook, the kind that brashly gives the middle finger salute to all conventional wisdom regarding food, health and nutrition. Like Mario Batali’s generous employment of lardo crudo or Au Pied de Cochon’s Martin Picard topping his signature poutine (french fries covered in cheese curds and gravy) with, yes, foie gras, Rucker joins the movement of culinary maximalism currently sweeping America’s food scene. Especially in Portland, as evidenced by the borderline insane “Voodoo Doughnut Cheeseburger” at The Original, and Voodoo’s own Maple Bacon Bar. This trend is obviously a backlash, a thumbing of collective noses against years of picky eaters, sauce-on-siders, vegans and other dietary malcontents so frequently bemoaned by fine-dining chefs, as well as a celebration of that delightful category of ingredients that will likely send you — both literally and figuratively — to heaven. Moderation and good common dietary sense have no place here. Foie gras jelly donuts, on the other hand…
To tell you the truth, I welcome this change. True, stuffing your face with foie at every opportunity is probably not the best thing for your health, but you know what? It’s not your body that needs it; it’s your soul. A little fatty duck liver every now and again is a thing of divine pleasure, and if it so happens that it becomes the instrument of my demise, I’ll go to my maker with a five mile-wide grin on my face. But not until after I’ve had my entree: Roasted pigeon atop spinach, shiitake mushrooms, pepper jam, and - that’s right - a square wedge of toast topped with pâté de foie gras.
What a way to go.
["I love the little crunchy things!" exclaimed my mother. "What, the feet?" "Oh my God...those were feet?!?!"]
More on these topics:
bacon doughnut, culinary maximalism, foie gras, foie gras jelly donut, le pigeon, meat, pigeon, portland, scott gold, shameless carnivore
Scot says:
God I miss living in Portland. The last few years there, I was fortunate enough to enjoy dining out almost daily for lunch. I now have high blood pressure and cholesterol, but on the bright side, I also have a whole new wardrobe!
Cheers!
Kingfish says:
Yeah, you rite!
What would Vic 'n Nat'ly say-
16 dollahs fa WHAT?
cheeflo says:
Death, where is thy sting?
cpm says:
Sure. Your soul needs tortured animal renderings. Except if you listen to what smart people say, like Ghandi and Einstein. Oh yeah, you're probably a fan of the last eight years where the "Who cares what you think,""My way or the highway," "Idiots are smarter" George W. Bush mentality reigned.
By the way, most fine-dining chefs I have run into are supremely excited to come up with an 8-course vegetarian feast, with its delicate nature and openness to artistry. As one said to me once, "I'm so sick of rare, medium-rare, and well done. This will be an exciting challenge." I was full and happy after the meal. Oh yeah, and pretty fucking healthy too. At least I won't need ED drugs when I'm older. ;)
Mason Lerner says:
Interesting. But I will stick with a nice, warm chocolate/peanut covered from Shipley's.
Scott Gold says:
@cpm: I'm sorry this piece didn't please you. It sounds like you're really hungry. That's okay - I get cranky and emotional when I'm hungry, too. Also, I have to credit you for the inadvertent blast of creative genius. "Your Soul Needs Tortured Animal Renderings" might not make a whole lot of sense from a culinary standpoint, but seriously: BEST. METAL ALUM TITLE. EVER.
ethical human says:
I for one cannot *wait* until this horrible bacon/unhealthy food fad blows over. It's disgusting. Foie gras should be banned, it's absolutely barbaric! Please stop making snarky comments about vegetarians ("you must be hungry"), vegetarians are people with a conscience who are trying to do the right thing (for our bodies and for the world), instead of just living for our own sensory gratification. We are perfectly well-fed and nourished and not cranky due to lack of animal fat - we're just tired of uninformed carnivores making ill-considered comments.
ivan says:
@ ethical human: i find hard to believe that a 20000 years old "fad" will blow anytime soon, humans are omnivores by nature, our teeth, stomach and digestive system are built to process meat (yes, even the cute animal's one) as well as veggies. Regarding the barbaric way we "harvest" our meals, well if only that was the most barbaric and cruel thing human beings do to any living creature, we would be fine as species at this point in time. Listen, if you want to be a vegan or a vegetarian (a little compromise goes a long way, doesn't it?) knock yourself out. This article made me hungry not angry, and wanting foie gras, maybe not with jelly donuts, but still!
And for stopping being snarky with vegetarians, we'll do when vegetarians stop being selfrightoues cultural kamikaze.
Peter says:
Wow. I think everything is possible with this mixture.
Phyllis says:
I can't resist throwing in here the well-known saying, "You can coat a turd with powdered sugar, but you still don't have a jelly doughnut."
Chef Gwen says:
Too bizarre...I ate at Le Pigeon on Jun 30, blogged about it July 13, and found your post via twitter today. I skipped the foie gras after overhearing a nearby visiting chef eating at the bar tell the chef what he thought about it, but I didn't miss the pigeon, crispy feet and all.
I think Le Pigeon is the mascot for all the wonderful indies in Portland. Such a rich food town.
ethical human says:
Ivan: I'm talking about the current cultural obsession with bacon, not the history of humans eating animals, which, obviously, goes back a long time.
Humans have not been eating factory-farmed bacon and foie gras for 20000 years, they were hunting for wild game, which is very much different.
And, furthermore, humanity has undoubtedly progressed a long way since then - many practices that used to be permissible (slavery, beheadings in public squares, etc) are no longer considered acceptable. This will eventually extend to barbaric practices such as factory farming and force-feeding geese so you can feast on their diseased, engorged livers.
dmst says:
@cpm and ethical human: do some yoga, get your kirtan vibe on, heck, have a drink [Hey! There's a new acai spirit just for you!] - but whatever you do, loosen up. That self righteous bile you continue to aggresively spew does little more than damage your own blood pressure and the only karma in it is that your bitterness is someone else's momentary comedy.
On the other hand, without delightful gems of social evolution and humanity such as yourselves, there would be no Inappropriate Yoga Guy to lighten the day, so I'll take it all back and encourage you in your arm breaking activities of vehement self congratulation. I'll go on enjoying my meal of tortured animal renderings while watching your spectacle. Which, of course, directly precedes the public beheadings.
Namaste.
Sarah says:
I loved this article, Scott! I'm a proud carnivore but have never actually gotten up the nerve to try foie gras. After reading this, however, I feel like I've been missing out! Keep up the good work!
cameron says:
I'm a vegetarian, and a chef. Foie Gras upsets me and disturbs me, but this is a brilliant idea.
Mike says:
I had a snarky comment for the testy vegan/vegetarian lobby but I realize now there's no changing closed minds. Oh well. More foie gras for me.
Louisa says:
Fun piece! Glad to know you enjoyed your visit to PDX. I'm linking to it from my blog.
http://theportlandpickle.com/
Yawn says:
Oh good, another "enlightening" argument pitting vegetarianism versus omnivorism. For an encore can we please debate whether Mac or PC is the superior operating system? At least Mr. Gold's article itself was interesting.
ethical human says:
Yawn: maybe ethics are boring to you but it's an important topic. And, with respect to Mac vs PC: in terms of viruses, reliability, stability, etc, MacOS has clear advantages. Just like vegetarianism has clear advantages when you look at impact on your health, and on the planet. So why do people still use PCs and eat meat? Seems to me that (A) they don't have all the information, (B) they are mislead by advertising and media, (C) they are afraid of change, and (D) "everybody else is doing it".
Spinkter says:
My god, he took the bait!
David says:
This author reminds me of a heroin addict or a kiddie porn connoisseur. "A little fatty duck liver every now and again is a thing of divine pleasure, and if it so happens that it becomes the instrument of my demise, I’ll go to my maker with a five mile-wide grin on my face." Creepy.