Fare la Civetta

(To flirt — but literally, to make like an owl)

Flirting has long been Italians’ favorite pastime. In 1494, the scholar and poet Poliziano used the word “civettare” to describe women who were making like owls (civette), shrewd predators that coo softly to attract birds close enough to grasp them in their claws.  About a century later, in 1597, playwright Giovan Maria Cecchi, author of The Horned Owl,  referred to a civetta as a “una donna fatua e vanitosa che vuol attirare l’attenzione degli uomini“  (a silly, vain woman who wants to attract the attention of men).  Other writers extended “civetteria” to anyone deliberately seeking to attract the admiration of others.

In English, everyone and anyone with a seductive smile and a ready wink falls into the generic category of flirt. In his Dizionario dei sinonimi, an encyclopedic narrative dictionary of Italian synonyms  published in 1864, Nicolò Tommaseo distinguished between a civettino, a precocious boy flattering a pretty woman; a civettone, a boorish lout doing the same; a civettina, an innocent coquette; and a civettuola, a brazen hussy.

Nowadays, Italian say flirtare (from the English), fare il filo (make a thread), tacchinare (act and play like a turkey), fare la gallina or l’oca (make like a hen or a goose) and corteggiare (court with romantic interest).  One of my Italian friends describes the subtle art of corteggiamento as an Olympic sport — if one knows how to corteggiarsi con leggerezza e gioco (woo lightly and playfully).

To be a skilled corteggiatore (suitor), a man must be able to abbordare (chat up or approach) a woman, or else he might actually importunare (annoy) the object of his desire.  Then he would seem to be, not an owl, but a pavone (peacock), a galletto (rooster), a tacchino (turkey) or — far, far worse — a maiale or porco (pig).

Flirts often use the same pick-up lines in Italy as anywhere else: “Vuoi bere qualcosa?“  (”Would you like a drink?) “Non ci siamo già visti prima?“  (”Haven’t we seen each other before?”) “Scusa, posso dirti che hai degli occhi stupendi?” (”May I tell you that you have amazing eyes?”) But some Italian are more creative. Here’s a straight-from-the-streets example:

“Mi indicheresti la direzione?” (”Can you tell me the way?”)
“Quale direzione?” (”Which way?”)
“Quella per il tuo cuore.” (”The way to your heart!”)

Words  and Expressions

fare un filo spietato — openly flirting with someone

Mi piaci di brutto!  — I like you way too much!

Sei irresistibile –  I can’t resist you

Sei uno spettacolo! — You are spectacular.

Ho perso il mio numero di telefono, potrebbe prestarmi il suo? –  I’ve lost my telephone number, could I borrow yours?

Hai da fare per I prossimi cent’anni? – What are you doing for the next hundred years?

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